Tuesday, January 18, 2011

It ain't no musical

The past three and a half months has been an amazingly complex "schooling" for me. One that is not even over yet.

From the moment I found out that Mr. Wonderful had no job, God began the process of teaching my heart and mind so many things. (Disclaimer: most of these lessons have not been absorbed yet for sure!)

I have been learning Who I believe in and that no matter what I feel or see, it is what He has said that is The Reality.

I have been learning that I hate Winter. Metaphorically, figuratively and literally. I love the holidays, but once they are over I would just like to skip on to Spring. I hate the greyness, the solitude, the coldness and the absence of any sign of growth and life. But Winter where God has me, in relationships, in Mr. Wonderful's employment and in the actual season we are in here in the South. And it is during this time that all the preparations for Spring (literally and figuratively) occur.

I have been learning how important hope is. How hope does not disappoint. And I cling to that.

I have been learning that I have very limited control in my life. It is basically relegated to the areas of my attitude and my actions. Nothing else. I run into nothing but frustration when I try to exert it in any other arena. And actually, the control I even try to exhibit within myself is fruitless without God's intervention.

I have been learning about generosity. Generosity from humans and from my Heavenly Father. Lavishness is a better word. It is really another post all in itself as there have been too many instances to list!

I have been learning where I am weak and where I excel.

I have been learning where my false hope and confidence have been placed.

I have been learning how very intrigued I am with the precious people of India and their culture.

I have been learning how much people like to share and how gratifying it is to share with others.

I have been learning how God, as He did with Job, never allows the enemy to take something that He does not have plans to replenish. And oh, how sweet it is when He does and how much more I appreciate it.

There is so much more, however I realize that this post is getting really long and most of you, like me, begin to shut down after the first 300-500 words. So I will conclude by saying, I am learning. Some of it is painful. Some of it is beautiful. But what an amazing curriculum discomfort is.

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